With you around me I don't feel that its over

Four years ago I tried to kill myself. I saw what my future held and I didn't like what I saw. I was already addicted to meth/cocaine at that point in time and I didn't see myself getting any better. I saw what I would be and eventually became that person. Someone who couldn't live without the drugs. I saw it coming and did nothing to change but a feeble attempt to end it all. I couldn't see how I could change. Although I have changed in a way, I still have a hard time seeing myself going on without the drugs and the lifestyle, it was everything to me. It was everything I was. I have decided to do something that is really easy to say and really hard to do. I just need to move on.