he would never know that they were claiming regret as their own

I'm mostly confused these days. I don't yet know what I am going to do with my life. I don't quite know what it is I'm feeling most of the time either. That is probably due to my years of numbness I created for myself. I do know I feel alot of sorrow. Most of which I think is due to the fact that I haven't quite accepted that I will never do drugs again. I was somewhat good at my job so it is kind of depressing to know I have to find a new avenue in which to make money. Or maybe its sorrow for those that will never get another chance at life before its too late. Or for my lost friends I don't know. I do know that I don't want to give up what I now have. I just want to make it better and quickly which is not how it works. It takes time. But as long as I don't use it can't get any worse, it can only get better.