existential depression

I just read this article and it basically defined what I have felt my entire life, only now its so much more. Death, freedom, isolation, meaninglessness. We all die, in order to survive we must give up certain freedoms, we can never really grow close to someone. And if you add all these things together there is really no point. Only add to it my past and you get something greater. In my opinion most of the things I've done in the past have been bad things. Now sometimes I don't see how I'll ever be able to overcome my past and create something better. Most times I am able of deluding myself into thinking I can be so much more, but at times I just don't see the point. Also each day I spend alone at the house with nothing changing just slowly wears away and self confidence I might have had.

hitting bottom

WE must all hit bottom before we can reach our peak. We must know how low we can go before we can discover just how high we can reach. The future will be yours for the taking. The bottom is not a place you can choose to exist at. There is only a rise after every fall. It is the way of the world. The more falls the higher you will be able to reach.

I have rediscovered the joy of AFI- Decemberunderground it brings joy to my eyes and makes the world seem that everything will be alright, that everyone goes through this and it will be alright afterwards